MY ILLUMINATED LIFE;
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
EnnEAgrAm
i remembered doing one 2-3 years ago. can't remember what was my type. checked my email and tot it would be interesting to do it again and see wats my type. didnt expect mine to be humanitarian. but reflecting on it made me realise it's kinda true. here's my report.
THE HUMANITARIAN
Service to others is the rent you pay for your room here on earth. — Muhammad Ali
As a Type 2, The Humanitarian, you can feel strongly that your purpose on earth is to be of service to others and to make a difference in the world. Indeed, it's likely that you have a very clear image of yourself as a helper. Whether you take on responsibility in your family, your community, or on a global level, you may need to feel that you're having a positive impact for your life to feel balanced and right. As a result, you probably get involved in a great variety of projects, sometimes over-extending yourself because you have trouble saying no. You may figure that there's no way you can refuse when there's so much to be done in the world. This kind of caring is an admirable trait. Just make sure that you leave yourself time to rest.
Although you typically spend a great amount of time and energy helping others, people shouldn't mistake you for being totally selfless. On the contrary, you probably know that you're willing to use your influence over other people to get what you want. After all, it may only seem fair that you would be on the receiving end once and a while. However, the best way to get what you need is to be a good guardian of your own inner resources and property. Know that you can be a giving person and still have some things you keep for yourself.
Like everyone, to some extent your personality has been shaped by past experiences. One reason you may identify with Humanitarians, Enneagram Type 2, is if you were often praised for being a good child. Having a few formative experiences where you got what you wanted by pleasing others may have caused you to continue your people-pleasing ways into adulthood. Another possibility is that during childhood you may have had to raise a parent's spirit by serving as an emotional crutch. If this is true for you, it's not surprising that you developed a need to help out emotionally during hard times.
How your type work for (or against) you
When you're feeling your best, you probably have faith in the goodness of life, sensing that everyone's needs will be ultimately satisfied by a force greater than yourself. At these times, giving to yourself can be the greatest reward, whether you're treating yourself to a special present or simply taking time out to relax and enjoy your day. By nurturing yourself this way, you create the necessary conditions to reach your full potential. You also store up more energy to help others by taking good care of yourself.
However you aren't likely to be at your best every day. During the times when you're feeling your worst, you can become over invested in being indispensable and having people need you. You probably even feel that you know what others' need more than they know themselves. Strangely enough, when you're experiencing these feelings, you may find yourself disappointing others or becoming unhelpful. This failure to meet others needs can lead you to an even lower opinion of yourself. Know that such a downward spiral is caused by a belief that you cannot be loved without being needed. In possessing this worldview, you can find yourself wholly focused on what other people want while repressing your own needs and desires.
How can you avoid feeling your worst and start feeling your best? Above all, pay attention to what you need and want out of life. Not only that — but start asking for it. It might be hard at first, but try to be more open to receiving help, advice, and gifts from others. Understand that you are an individual who deserves to be loved and helped without needing to give anything in return. Other people get satisfaction from being able to help too. Start to welcome their assistance. In addition, try to spend time developing your sense of self and your independent interests. Focus on things that have nothing to do with needing to contribute to someone else's well-being or success. It's okay to be centered on you.
Compatibility in Love
As a Type 2, The Humanitarian, your typical strategy when looking for love likely involves fulfilling others' needs in exchange for love. To do this, you can make continued efforts to anticipate what others want from you and to wow them with special efforts on their behalf. In essence, you try to be indispensable. You want any date of yours to know what a great partner they've discovered. You may attempt to do this by trying to create really memorable experiences for your date — with little concern for your own enjoyment. You may also focus conversation on the person you're dating rather than on yourself.
At times, these methods will work like a charm. When they don't, you're likely to feel a bit rejected.At times when you feel unloved, you'll probably hold resentment against others for not seeing how valuable and lovable you are to them. In a move toward greater self-acceptance, try to understand that your self-worth doesn't depend on your ability to fulfill the desires of others. Create some space for yourself to appreciate your own identity, aside from caring for others. You can do this by not giving more than is needed, listening to your own needs, and allowing yourself to receive from others. Let yourself feel worthy of love and attention, no matter how much you give, or do not give, to others.
Compatibility at Work
You'll usually do your best in positions where you get to interact with lots of people. This leverages your ability to draw people out and engage with them. In management positions, you can be a caring and thoughtful leader. You seem to excel in encouraging others to reach their potential and advance within an organization. Fields you're most likely to be suited for include social services, fundraising, and human resources.When you're considering employment with a new company, one of the most important things for you to think about is how well you'll get along with your potential co-workers.
mUttOns bLeAtEd at... 2/28/2007 06:35:00 AM
Sunday, February 25, 2007
hIStOrY tEst
haven got time to blog this whole week. much as i wanted to. but got an essay to rush assignments that were due. even my psychology notes is behind schedule. gotta work on it soon.
damn. i have a history test next week and i am so not looking foward to it. went to the review for the test last week and did not noe a heck wat they were talking about. and the worst thing is that the guy conducting the review did not even bother to clarify the points. in the end, josh and i decided to bounce. *zzz.. wat a complete waste of time!
ok ok. i noe i always fall asleep during history lectures. but it'll be good if he at least had a textbook that i can study. rather than base his lectures on a multimedia presentation of himself! and 70-80% of the test will be on wat he teaches in class. the remaining 20-30% is on a literary text he had written. *sighz.. this is the only subject that will potentially hurt my perfect GPA score.
got a bio test this week too. guess this will be the most trying week for me so far. but good news is after which there will be no more tests till after spring break. was thinking of tidying up my room a little after that.
oh yarz. though this maybe a lil late but nonetheless i still wanna wish you all a Happy Chinese New Year! Gong Xi Fa Cai! May all our wishes and dreams come true in this lunar new year. *smilez..
mUttOns bLeAtEd at... 2/25/2007 10:47:00 PM
Saturday, February 17, 2007
mEE SiAm
i juz had mee siam! i so love the taste of it in my mouth once again. big thanks to my aunt jac for specially making it for me! realli appreciated the thought and effort put into it. oh and btw.. I'M IN HOUSTON for the CHINESE NEW YEAR!!! *jumps up and down.. it was all possible bcoz i manage to change my sat lab class to mon and bcoz my frens gave me a ride down here! *grinz..
the week has been good. got back my bio and stats test results. got full marks for both. so far so good. juz had a psychology test today and i want it to be the same. next week seems to be a very tough week as i have an essay and stats homework due. *zzz.. even gotta work while i'm here *sighz..
got another bio test and history test coming up. so maybe it's time to stop oversleeping lectures. *opps.. wif tt kinda history teacher i think i got a whole lot to buck up myself.
mUttOns bLeAtEd at... 2/17/2007 11:48:00 AM
Monday, February 12, 2007
fAirYtAlEs
i have loved fairytales all my life. i am sure most people out there likes them too. especially for the happy ending. all's well ends well. i have always loved the joy it brought me.
to me, fairytales are an escape from reality which i feel is a good thing. you get to imagine yourself to be who you want to be. you can be Prince Charming, the fire-slaying knight in his shining armour or simply the hero that saves the day. *smilez..
people often think that "fairytale-lovers" are idealistic people who always dream of the perfect scenerio happening to them. i totally agree with that. i am an idealist. i used to spend lots of time thinking away. whether it happened a not, it doesn't matter. bcoz at least i was happy at that time and that is enuff.
even till today, i still believe in fairytales. i have always believed in them and will continue to believe in them. i don't care about what people think. since young i had this thought, "if you truly believe in fairytales, your life might very well be a fairytale." fairytales have been an integral part of my childhood and it will continue to be. the question is.. would you like to be part of my fairytale?
mUttOns bLeAtEd at... 2/12/2007 01:39:00 PM
Friday, February 09, 2007
i nEEd gOOd fOOd !!!
played a lil soccer b4 i went for dinner juz now. it was damn cold! *brr.. but it got better as i ran around. seriously, i didn't play very well juz now. i expected the playing conditions to be different but not that bad. i'm so totally not used to playing over here. the air that you breathe in is so cold that it chills your lungs. your throat becomes very dry and soon starts to hurt. your muscles also take longer to warm up. i guess it's juz my body telling me that i need to exercise more. *lol..
finally! i ate some better food! am so bored of eating the same stuffs over at the roadrunner cafe. it used to be good but now it kinda sux. the only thing that realli taste nice there are the sandwiches and i am beginning to get tired of eating them.
aniwae had a chubby checker cheeseburger over at the John Peace Library. the meal trade included fries (which was very GOOD! *lol..) and a 16 oz. drink. i might consider eating dinner over there for mon to thur (since that is the only time that they operate till.. *sighz)
i am beginning to miss the food back home in s'pore. juz that day when i was studying for my bio test, i sudd craved for mee rebus and my mum's mee siam. *lol.. dun laugh k. it's true! it's bcoz there is a serious lack of variety over here. it's like pasta, pizza, chicken (lots of them!) , rice (that cannot make it), burgers (that sux), fried rice (that is extremely salty!) etc. yea. you noe wat i mean. it's always the same old food everyday. come to think bout it. i am actually ok wif the limited choices i have.. but i need GOOD FOOD! *dreamz..
mUttOns bLeAtEd at... 2/09/2007 10:08:00 AM
Wednesday, February 07, 2007
thE rEal bAttlE bEGIns..
people have been complaining that i never update my blog as frequently as i used to. pai sei larz. but i'm not as free as i used to be le ma where i can walk walk here walk walk there, take photo here take photo there etc. much as i wanna update my blog but tests, projects, quizzes and homework are beginning to stream in. it will only be a matter of time b4 it starts flooding in. so do understand that i will try to update my blog as much as possible only if the time permits. the real battle is about to begin.. *psyches..
had my first test of the semester. bio. not exactly my favourite subject but i like the lecturer. felt the test was a give away. but i decline to comment further till i get my results back.
got back my stats homework. scored a 100! if i did not see wrongly, only one other person scored a 100 in the class. aniwae good morale booster for thur's stats test. did not study today because wanted to relax after studying hard for the bio test. will start studying for stats tom.
so far so good. the week had better stay this way. wish me luck for my stats test. *beams..
mUttOns bLeAtEd at... 2/07/2007 03:07:00 PM
Sunday, February 04, 2007
bAd wEEk
i noe this post is kinda late but have been busy studying and preparing for my tests next week. got 2 tests nxt week. biology and statistics. been quite a stressful week for me with all the assignments and projects due this week. so tts y i can only blog now.
i screwed my lab quiz totally this morn. i'm so pissed! *argh.. it's like i noe the answers but all the fucking careless mistakes! *zzz.. hate it when that happens. and quizzes takes up 20% of my overall semester score. so it makes it all the more worse! *argh.. since it's over then juz fuck it.
aniwae something unbelieveable happened this week. i overslept through my classes yesterday. when i got up, it was almost the end of my psychology class. damn it. i wasn't so worried bout my psychology class. i was worried bout my comms class because my attendance meant a grade! *argh.. i didn't even hear my alarm clock ring! which made me wonder if i even set it. but tt feeling sux. seems like i have a real bad week. better make sure i do well for all the tests and no more screw-ups.
had a drinking fest last nite wif john, michael and brian. maggie dropped by later to join us. played lots of drinking card games. had a a crap load of laughter when they started to get a lil drunk and prank calling their frens. *lol.. i downed 5 beers last nite. we even tried to build a "beer can pyramid" *lol.. realised tt coors light is quite a good beer. but decided to stop since i had lab today. they continued playing before going to sleep. i muz admit yesterday nite was the only saving grace for this week. *sighz..
mUttOns bLeAtEd at... 2/04/2007 04:11:00 AM
